I'm always looking for signs from God. It doesn't matter what it is, but I am on the constant look out for God.
Today, I wasn't feeling the faith. I applied for a position, and I received a phone call from the person in charge. I missed his initial phone call, but I was so excited, because he called me so quickly. I thought this was a "Sign from God". He finally got in touch with me on Friday. The first thing he said was, "Well first thing...I'm not hiring you for this position." He went on to explain that he was looking for someone more technical. He just wanted to know if I had any questions. I ended the conversation with a thank you, but I felt so depressed. I just knew this was the one God had for me.
Not too long ago, I was taking my mother to class. My mother was stressing about her course, and we looked up to see a Texas license plate. You may not know this, but my mother and I plan on moving to Texas. I thought this was a sign from God too.
Now, I'm feeling like a failure. Nighttime is the worst for me. I hear things like "You're a failure.", "You're never going to make it." "You're disgusting.", "You have two degrees, and you can't even make them work for you." I could go on and on.
Well, today my mother and I prayed that she would get an A on her Algebra exam. I prayed in agreement with her, but I really wasn't feeling the faith. Guess what? My mother got an A on her exam. I'm so proud of her, yet I'm scared to call this a sign from God. Is He letting us know that He is about to answer our prayers? Am I putting too much into looking at this as a sign? I just don't know.
I'm continuing to seek God. I'm going to continue to ask Him for answers to our prayers. I just wish I could be more positive to the wonderful people that are following my blog.
Please keep me in your prayers. I pray that I will have praises to post soon.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)