Being scared, but remaining faithful

Well...I wanted to give you an update on my status. I'm still looking for a job. I had two phone interviews yesterday (10/19). The first one seemed to go well, but I feel I didn't do well with the question on how I prioritize my job assignments. The second over the phone interviewer felt that I didn't have enough experience, but she stated that I should continue to look at their website for jobs. I sent them both thank you letters, and I added a sample of my work to the first person I interviewed with. I really want that job, and I hope that they will call me in for a second interview.

I have to admit that I'm scared. Winter is just around the corner, and I'm not sure how I will heat my house. You cannot live without heat in my state, because it can get so cold that your pipes will burst.

My mother and I continue to pray in agreement. Praise the Lord...God will provide.

Being Honest With God

Lately, I've been pretty upset with God. My mother and I have been praying in agreeance for a few months now, but we have not received answers to our major prayers.

Times are so scary for us right now. We have to worry about heating our home this winter. We have to worry about paying our monthly mortgage. We don't have jobs and no prospects. What are we going to do?

I love my time with God. I let Him know how I feel. I've been claiming Matthew 18:19-20. I believe that the most powerful prayer you can do is pray with someone and agree in prayer. God doesn't put a but or an if in these verses. He states, "Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. 20For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." He says anything you ask for and it will be done for you by Him.

Well, my mother and I have certain requests that we have written down. We have not received the answers we expected. I know that God doesn't always answer our prayers they way we expect. I was prepared for this...or so I thought I was prepared.

I've been honest with God. I told Him that I thought the He would've answered at least one of our major prayers. I let Him know that I was scared. I also let Him know that I was disappointed. I told Him that we are going by faith, and holding Him to His promise of Matthew 18:19-20. Do you know what else I told Him? I let Him know that I truly believed that He was going to answer our prayers.

I do believe that God is going to work amazing things in my life. I just have that voice in my head going on and on that things are not going to work out. I will keep you posted about God's blessings in my life.

I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. (Psalm 34:4)

Trust in the Lord and do good; so you will live in the land, and enjoy security. Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:3-5, 7a)

Where Are You God?!?!

Wow...It's been a struggle with faith lately. There are times when I was so sure that I heard God, but I guess I've been hearing Him wrong.

I’m at a point in my prayer life where I don't know what to pray. I just don't know. I feel like I'm chasing after all of the wrong things, but I don't know what the right things are. Have you been there? I need God's guidance. I need to see Him working in my life.

I will say that I know that God has never left me, but I'm still asking for God to reveal Himself to me. I was trying to think of a word that would describe the way I feel, and I believe that discouraged would fit.

Joshua 1:9 "I command you, be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go".

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope".

Faith Going Towards The Valley

I have to admit that my faith is going towards the valley. I talked to God yesterday to let Him know my concerns. My mother and I have been praying in agreement for a while now. We believed that God was going to work miracles in our lives.

Last night, my mother and I were getting ready to pray. She asked me if I've noticed any changes in my life, since we started praying in agreement? I could not bring myself to tell her no, so I answered by saying that God is working on something. In my heart, I have to say that I'm asking the same question.

I understand that God's time is not our time. I understand that God answers all prayers. I also understand that I have to have faith. Have you ever just wished that God would just speak to you? That's where I am at now.

I'm going to keep believing. I've heard that when you are down that when God starts working miracles. Well...I'm down.

Isaiah 30:19 "O people of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious He will be when you cry for help. As soon as He hears, He will answer you."

2 Samuel 22:31 "God's way is perfect. All the Lord's promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to Him for protection."

God...Why?!?!

Have you ever just wondered why God allows you to go through so many difficulties at once? Have you ever truly believed that God was going to answer your prayers in a particular way, only to find out that He did not. I'm going through this now.

I went on an interview with a company, and it seemed to go so well. I thought for sure that they would call me back for a second interview. On Monday, I received a phone, and I thought that this was God's answer. I found out that they were just calling me to thank me for coming in to the interview, but they decided to look at other candidates. I was heartbroken.

My faith plummeted. I prayed to God. At that moment, I had to let Him know that I didn't know what to pray. I was disappointed. I felt like I didn't have any direction. I did not know what to do.

I decided to call a friend. She told me that I had to praise my way out of this feeling. She told me that God will answer my prayers, but I have to continue to have faith.

Do you know what I had forgotten? The devil is a liar. I let him tell me that I was never going to get a job. I let him tell me that God was not going to answer my prayers. For a brief moment, I allowed him to win.

God never left me. If I'm honest with myself...I really didn't want this job. I knew it wasn't for me...but my desperate need for a job made me lose focus.

God is going to see me through these trials. I know He's going to honor His word. Praise the Lord!!!!

"I will never leave you nor forsake you." Hebrews 13:5

Waiting On God

Waiting on God is one of the most difficult challenges in life. We know that God can answer all prayers right away, so why doesn't He? Well, let me say that God is not our concierge God. He is our Father. He doesn't have to.

You know what I've found? God is always right on time. I have to be honest with you, God is taking a very long time answering me and my mother's prayers. My mother's faith has taken a big hit. Guess what? My faith has been fluctuating too. I did talk to God today. I told Him that I thought He would've answered at least one of my mother's and I prayers. Well, I think that I heard Him say, "It's coming!!!" Let me just say, "PRAISE THE LORD!!!!"

I know that waiting on God is hard. I always have to remember that God's time is not our time. I also remember that in the end, God's way is the best. Remember to keep the faith.

Matthew 17:20 He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

The Ups & Downs of Faith

Well...My mother and I are continuing to pray in agreement. I've also started to fast. I'm trying to get closer to God and find His answers. I will say that I do feel closer to God, but the answers are not really coming. I spoke to God, and I asked why hasn't He answered the easy prayers. I feel like God is telling me, "All in good time." Well, I know we've all heard the saying, "God's time is not our time."

Right now, I'm just trying to find things to be thankful for. For example, I'm a part of an organization that helps Veterans. I was the only woman for a while. Recently, we added three other women to the organization. One of the women has her own business. She helps people find jobs, and she also mentors people. Surprisingly, a company that I've always wanted to work for has a job that fits me. I applied for the job, and I sent an email to everyone in the organization to see if they know someone at the company. This woman who is new to the organization replied to my email stating that she connected with her contacts to let them know I applied for a job with this company. PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!

I feel like God is teaching me patience. I think He's ready to answer our prayers, but He wants us rely on Him. God knows that we will have moments where we need reassurance, but there are times when we just have to know that God is handling everything. I believe that this is one of the times in my life that I just have to trust that God is in control.

‘Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:10